Saturday, 12 August, 1865

A pretty morning. After breakfast, Rose and I walked in the garden. A deep gloom seems to have taken possession of my mind, so settled and permanently fixed that I cannot extricate myself from it. I feel and know that it is wrong, still I am powerless and can only hope in God’s mercy. I acknowledge the depth of all my sin. I know wherein I have erred and laid the foundation for all my trouble. – – The children came from Richmond about ten o’clk. Hardie and Bake both had chills.1In a rare case of inattention or distraction, Caroline actually writes in the Journal, “Hardie and Bake had both had chills.” I have omitted the first had. They brought Nan home and Bake went straight to bed. Made the purchases she expected to do in Richmond. Hardie bought a gallon whiskey and purchased 30 lbs. sugar. Mary sent me a bucket of rice. – – Disposed of the butter at $.40 pr. pound. – – Rose left in the wagon when Zac took it home. Duroc was quite sick after getting from Richmond. He got over it though and Zac drove him and Shakespeare to the wagon.